Shut Up It's On

The A story of this week’s episode was about getting too far into the lives of your coworkers. Since Veronica sucked up all of Ted’s time that Lem and Phil so desperately needed to explain the phenomena of the red coat, they were left to create their own wild fantasies.

I just really wish they had a flashback to that fu manchu…

We begin with Linda and Ted updating Veronica about a cheese that doesn’t age. Here we learn Veronica purrs while sleeping. And that she is still seeing Mordor, her handsome magician man. Turns out this isn’t all they do together. They race cars in the desert, fence, scuba dive, and of course have hours upon hours of sex. Sounds fun, right? But Veronica can’t really keep up and between Mordor and work, she’s exhausted.

Linda decides then that it is Ted’s job to fix this. Of course he doesn’t agree but then does because that furthers the plot and him saying no doesn’t. Duh. Ted tells Mordor to tone it down in a way that Mordor doesn’t take as tone it down. Ted of course gets flustered and not wanting Mordor to start having sex with Veronica while she’s asleep, only manages to get that point across.

Believing he has solved the problem a little bit he retreats. Lem and Phil, (an enraged Phil mind you) storm his office demanding to know what this red lab coat is about. It was waiting for Lem in his locker, and its unexplained presence makes it far greater than what it is really worth. Ted has honestly never heard of it, but believes its a sign of a good job. This of course boosters productivity among Phil, aching for the coat, and Lem who just wants to hold on to it.

Back on the A side of things, Linda finds Mordor and an accountant getting it on in the supply closet. She again, urges Ted to get involved in things he has no place in, and tell Veronica. He almost backs out, finding out the true meaning behind the coat (it means nothing, changes boost productivity!) but then blurts it out. Then Veronica shoots Mordor with a spear gun accidently. Because they were going scuba diving, it isn’t far fetched AT ALL.

While waiting at the hospital to make sure he’s okay, Veronica explains how her subconscious got the best of her and probably made her do that. Her douchey subconscious. She decides it’s best for her to break up with him. Or not. They decide to call it even. “You can’t tell Mordor to be less passionate! It’d be like telling Gandhi to be less, whatever he was. Thin.”

Veronica decides Ted has become way too invasive and wants him to keep his distance. So he’s sent to the ridiculously tiny office! Naturally it’s a great set up for some “hey that’s a lot of people in a small space” joke, so let it be so. Enraged, jealous Phil and normal Lem stop in to further press the issue of the coat. Since Ted can’t really explain the company policy he just eludes that maybe it isn’t something you should really bother with. Linda barges in, interrupting to argue with Ted about how he knows nothing about relationships. Phil and Lem stand by awkwardly, like children and humorously get out before it gets too heated. They decide the coat is a scarlet letter and aim to never receive it.

The next day at work, Phil comes in and gets the coat.

While Ted stops in to get a few things from his real office, Mordor is in there with another woman. Ted stands up for Veronica’s honor, that she deserves better and in turn gets slapped Peruvian style. Veronica tends to Ted, he was right, Mordor isn’t worth it, etc etc. They all live happily ever after.

But not really. Ted kindly gets rid of the red coat after Phil receives it two days in a row. As a peaceful gesture he leaves a single, red flower. Now what does that mean? Increased productivity for one!

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