Previously on Chuck…Chuck burned his first asset, Hannah started her new job at the Buy More, and there’s trouble in Awesome paradise.
This week, Hannah weasels her way into Chuck’s mission, and some mushy love shit happens.
SuperShaw was noticeably (and thankfully) absent last week. Unfortunately, he’s back this week. We start off with Shaw on a Mission Impossible mission, attempting to steal a mask from a museum vault and failing miserably. (Is he Tom Cruise? Maybe that’s why I hate him.)
Meanwhile, Chuck is getting his flirt on with Hannah at the Buy More, and he promises to take her on his next install. Sarah interrupts, because Shaw for some reason specifically needs Chuck to save him. Chuck flees the store on a “Buy More emergency,” which of course must mean an install, so Hannah tags along. So far this all seems like incredibly lazy writing, but whatever, I want a Sarah vs. Hannah catfight.
My bad. Shaw needs Chuck for his h4xx0r skillz. He needs to hack into the security system and shut the alarm off. My apologies to the writers. Hannah followed him in her car. Stalker! She’s got mad h4xx0r skillz too and reboots the server for Chuck. Why do computer skills make girls so much hotter? Mission accomplished. The client was so impressed he invited them back the next night to ensure nothing goes wrong when the mask of Alexander is unveiled, which is what Shaw was trying to steal in the first place, so this should make a second attempt easier.
I’m pretty sure Shaw is supposed to be a love interest for Sarah, but I don’t see the appeal. Sure, he’s fuckable, but loveable? Apparently he’s stalking her life and knows what kind of coffee she drinks and that she chews on her stirrer when she gets nervous. That’s definitely more creepy than sweet. She trashes the stirrer he gives her because she won’t give him the satisfaction of chewing on it. She totally drinks the coffee though.
In the mission briefing, we learn that the mask isn’t what they’re after but what The Ring might have hidden inside it. God damn, Shaw is trying too hard to get into Sarah’s pants. He’s laying it on thick. “You’ve gotta be kidding me.” Thank you, Sarah.
Hannah admits that she only took the job because of Chuck and proceeds to put the moves on him. Make-out time! Until Hannah spots Sarah on the security monitors. She points out Shaw’s hotness, to which Chuck replies, “Yeah, if you’re into the strong kind of Superman type of a guy.”
Chuck flashes on some guy with half his face burnt off. Shaw was the guy who burnt it, so he has to abort and go play in the van with Casey. Of course, Hannah sees this on the monitors and thinks he ditched her for his ex. Sad face! He cuts the feeds remotely, and Hannah is left panicking.
Sarah and Chuck exchange some jealous banter about Shaw and Hannah. Sarah is lowered down into the vault, but the Ring operatives find Chuck before she can steal the mask and replace it with a fake. The two switch places, and Chuck is left hanging while Sarah disposes of the bad guys. Meanwhile, Hannah is too good at her job, and she and Shaw fight over the vault door controls. Chuck switches the masks just before Hannah locks Shaw out of the controls. Such a bright girl.
Chuck fails at explaining himself, and she leaves in a Huff. I really like Hannah. I’m glad they didn’t make her naive like Ellie or totally weird and stupid like the rest of the non-spies in the cast. Sorry to the Shuck ‘shippers, but she’s a much better fit with him than Sarah. If Sarah actually dated Chuck, she’d grow as a person and all that, but ultimately she’d realize that he’s too good for her (and that she’s too hot for him). Sarah would be better with someone with Shaw’s looks but with an actual personality behind them.
Burnt Face Man reviews the security footage. “Oh, he’s good. A real Casanova, this one. He used the blonde to get into the vault and seduced the computer girl to get into the security system.” He calls the Nerd Herd and asks Hannah to come back for more IT problems. He locks her in the vault and activates the security system, so Chuck has to come save her.
Meanwhile, Shaw and Sarah find out what was hidden inside the mask…a poisonous gas. Now they’re quarantined at Castle, and Chuck and Casey have an hour to get the counteragent from Burnt Face Man. Shaw admits he was hitting on her, and Sarah admitted she liked it. (Ew.) The gas is contained thanks to Castle’s security system, but Sarah’s already unconscious from the poison.
Chuck meets with the Ring operatives, but they won’t release Hannah, so he smashes the mask (with a smoke bomb in it, pretending it’s the poisonous gas). Burnt Face Man shits a brick because he only knows the counteragent is in a vase but doesn’t know which one (obviously, museums are full of vases). Chuck flashes on the correct vase, smashes it over Burnt Face’s head, and nabs the counteragent. He opens the vault just as Shaw arrives with Sarah, and they take their doses.
Now the girls are all “ZOMG MY HERO” to the boys. Really? That’s how they get together? The damsel in distress cliché? Now that’s lazy writing.
Chuck and Sarah have a lame “so I guess we’re both moving on” chat. Chuck makes out with Hannah, and oh my god, Zachary Levi is either gay or a horrible kisser…it’s kind of painful to watch. Sarah and Shaw get physical too, after she chews on the coffee stirrer he gave her (a new one, not the one she trashed, obviously).
Burnt Face Man lives. We get a sneak peak at The Ring. Burnt Face Man dies. Oh well.
The B-story: Morgan is hard at work, trying to figure out what’s going on with Chuck and his mysterious trip to Paris. He and Ellie think he’s in his “dark place” because Sarah dumped him. I’m pretty sure that was a few weeks ago when he looked like the unibomber covered in cheese ball dust. They attempt an intervention, but find him making out with his new girlfriend, so that explains what he’s been up to.
Next week: The Olympics. Chuck returns with new episodes on Monday, March 1, 2010. No preview yet, but Chuck goes undercover as the world’s most dangerous assassin and cooks dinner for Hannah, Ellie, and Awesome.
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