Shut Up It's On

In the cold opening there’s a little Boston vs. Philadelphia rivalry for greatest city in the world. Being from New York, they clearly meant second greatest city in the world, duh.

Liz and Jenna discuss Liz’s future husband attempts and the obvious failure that is Wesley. Despite a crappy second date, they fatefully meet again and decide to try once more. It still sucked but birthed the idea of going back to Dr. Kaplan to be put back under so they could sit in teh recovery room again, and figure out why they were meant for each other. Upon viewing other people in that room, they realize its the drugs, not them and decide to call it quits. As fate would have it, Wesley randomly shows up again and decides they’re settling soul mates and this sounds too depressing even for Liz, so she backs away and tells him it’s never happening. But something tells me this isn’t the last we see of Wesley Snipes…

The overtaking of NBC by Kabletown has left a toll on Jack. He initially tried to learn all he could about the company to become an asset but then was introduced to how they make money without expanding: porn. He can barely come to terms with this and even tells Liz that sometimes settling is what you have to do. But steering away from his own words and becoming inspired by his eulogy of Don, he comes up with an idea that Kabletown would love and actually create! Female porn! Having some guy nod and occasionally interject with a “you’re right” and you deserve better than him” all for the low price of $25 an hour. Well, Liz falls for it.

Tracy is dealt a problem that isn’t solvable in just one half hour episode. His ex-nanny wrote a tell-all exposing him for who he really is, a faithful husband. He starts losing his endorsements, Frank calls him a fraud and he’s just yet another the victim of a black man’s personal life getting in the way of his fame. Jenna is weirdly the voice of reason for Tracy, telling him to just go find the most desperate person in the office and have sex with them to save his career and family. He chose Liz, who turns him down but they have a really sweet heart to heart about it. Tracy still has to find his way out of this one though!

Things to remember til May, for sweeps:

Felt like I’m back at school learning about the dangers of book readin’!
But John Edwards and I were supposed to ride on their Cinco de Mayo float!
Jack, the master bater, Donahgy
And Alexander wept for there were no more worlds to conquer. Hans Gruber. Die Hard.
Women do have one insatiable need: to jabber.